Show me how to live

Sometimes life smaks of emotion and adrenaline. Sometimes darkness is heavy. Sometimes we grieve. Sometimes we overflow with good. Sometimes paperwork is a pain in the left cheek.

life rolls on. Day by day, week by week, month by month and year by year. Many have come before and many will come after. Not all will ask the questions that raise issue. Most will live and die. For the road is narrow. Much more narrow than I realized before this morning.

I try to get the most out of the day. Headaches and work, breakdowns and situations often try and steal away those precious moments when we forget we are alive.

being challenged by the faith of another or lack thereof, being challenged by the beliefs of another, or lack thereof, being reminded of how little I know keeps a bit of the fire raging in my head and heart.

Lately, as I told a friend, a majestic Lord has beckoned me to His presence. A great king, full of glory and wonder seated on His throne, ruling absolutely has called me out of slumber. The enormity of this One who spoke into existence all that is quite humbling to say the least. But for Jesus, I could not approach...But not for Jesus, I am not sure I would want to. Holiness cause me to tremble at times, as I get a glimpse of the floor before Him.

I had thought at one point in life that it was all good. Figured out and laid out. It did not work out as I had planned.

so this morning, I am in John, digging the Canaan visit. Digging the fact Jesus was at a wedding and digging the fact His mom was trying to do her mom deal. For a moment, I realized why I am loving Him so much. For a moment, I am picturing Jesus and a few of His boys hanging out drinking a glass of wine, talking about life, picturing Him smile as He puts His arm around someone and asks how they are. And unlike us, really wanting...And already knowing. It was cool to meditate on that. Soak it all in.

then...This...

John 2:23-25
23 Now when He was in Jerusalem at the Passover, during the feast, many believed in His name, beholding His signs which He was doing. 24 But Jesus, on His part, was not entrusting Himself to them, for He knew all men, 25 and because He did not need anyone to bear witness concerning man for He Himself knew what was in man.

is it possible that this still happens?

ok. I think I trust Jesus. But turns out that is not all to the equation. I trust Him, because...(insert stuff here).
cause He saved me?
cause he loves me?
cause he forgave me?
cause he blesses me?
cause he brought my son home from Iraq?
cause my daughter is safe?
cause my family is healthy?
cause my life is good?

turns out, I trust Him, but He may not trust me. He withheld Himself from men because he knew them. What the freak? This really smaks out the universalism view of all roads leading to God.

he knows us. The games we play, the lies we tell and keep secret. He knows us better than we realize.

now obviously, there are some He did not withhold himself from. Obviously, this is a light look at a very serious and heavy thought.

next time you wonder why the Holy Spirit is not moving in your life and the transformation power of the resurrection is not visible to those around you, the next time you wonder why you don't desire God, or why He does not allow you to play a bigger part in the kingdom...Ask yourself this question...

Does Jesus trust me? why or why not?



In with the early dawn
moving right along
I couldn't buy an eye of sleep
and in the aching night
under satellite
I was not received
with the stolen parts
a telephone in my heart
someone get me a priest
to put my mind to bed
this ringing in my head
is this a cure is or is this a disease

hey hey I said
near as I can figure
you gave me life now
show me how to live
hey hey I said
near as I can figure
you gave me life now
show me how to live
in the afterbirth
on the quiet earth
let this things remind me
you thought you made amend
you better think again
before my row defines you

hey hey i said
near as i an figure
you gave me life now show me how to live
hey hey i said
near as i can figure
you gave me life now
show me how to live

and in your waiting hands
i will land
and roll out of my skin
and in your final hours i will stand
ready to begin
ready to begin
ready to begin
ready to begin

hey hey i said
near as i can figure
you gave me life now
show me how to live
hey hey i said
near as i can figure
you gave me life now
show me how to live
show me how to live
show me how to live
show me how to live
show me how to live


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