Wall of Denial

"A wall of denial - is fallin’ down

Wo it’s fallin’ so hard - down to the ground

Never knew something so strong could be washed away by tears

But this wall of denial was just built on fear"

Stevie Ray Vaughn

i have spent years being controlled and led by the raw emotion of the soul.

reactions are quick, raw and sharp.

the smell of confrontation was intoxicating.

it made me feel alive.

right or wrong, it was the way i lived.

the realization of this has been somewhat difficult as of late.

as i try to move from reaction to understanding and purpose,

the reality is it is a hard road to leave.

as hard as it is to let that go, the frustration of living by that has long

since been overdue.

growth in the word, closeness of him who calls,

and recognition of the onslaught are breaking down the wall.

what was once a welcome feeling of raw emotion

has become a sick and heavy feeling.

change.

it is not always easy, but to actively take part in the

transformation from self to Christ likeness

is just amazing.

becoming.

more

like

Jesus.

tearing out the root so as to feel the pain, laying it at the feet of him who

understands the death oh so well.

remove the bricks that made the wall, so as to clear the foundation.

one more step. less is becoming more.