Wall of Denial

I often think more of myself than I ought.

Sunday, the lesson is about character.

as I have prepared, not as much time as I should, but any way. we often think of character and wonder whether we have it or not. will we have it when it comes to getting by on the small things? free parking over a paid parking lot...a friend told me he once sold his integrity for a 5.oo parking spot. I sold mine for less.

when no one is around, no one looking...what comes out is what is in.

looking for a place that is ours. a plot of ground we can stand and be recognized, or make a stand, I often look at those who have made leeps beyond the norm into sucess and reward. all the while thinking that it is this I should shoot for. at the root of this is what caused my wilderness wanderings.

the following was sent to me a few months ago. laugh and enjoy, as I was encouraged to do, but in the end...faithful obedience and perserverance to the place we have been sent to serve is what burns character into our being. then we have to wonder no more.

Bird Shit Preacher Boy
April 13, 2003 - 9:10pm

Did I mention that I have another job besides being the pastor of a church? I design and host websites for people. That's my other job.
In my circles we call that being bivocational. For some Christians, bivocational is a nice word for a minister who isn't "successful" enough to have a big church and is forced to take another job to survive.

I'm a very unsuccessful minister by all the popular standards. Spectacularly unsuccessful, as a matter of fact. Our church has grown from 17 families to 34 families in the ten years that I've been pastor.

That's not considered fast growth for churches down here in Texas. The Branch Davidian church in Waco <http://www.religioustolerance.org/dc_branc1.htm> grew faster than ours, and you had to quit having sex with your spouse before you could join them. What's up with that?
I might write a book for ministers. If I do I'll call it, "How to Add 17 Families to Your Church in Only Ten Years of Busting Ass."

You see, we were already into the whole "church thing" before we discovered that all the stuff you have to do if you want your church to grow is exactly all the stuff we hate most in this world. We decided we didn't have to do anything we hated as long as we didn't mind being small and not having much money.

All things considered, it's a pretty good tradeoff. I say "pretty" good because I DO have to have this whole other job, and I drive an old car that's always covered in bird shit.
I admit the bird shit comes from having trees over our driveway and not from having two jobs and a small church. I gotta tell you though, watching my wipers smear through bird droppings while I rush from one job to the other tends to make me feel worse about everything.
At first I thought of myself as a pastor who designed websites on the side. After awhile I began thinking of myself as a web designer who did a little preaching on the side.
Now I think of myself as a guy in a shitty car, doing what he can to get by in this crazy world.
I think this is the price of doing church in ways that are meaningful to us. It's not everyone's way, but it is our way.

So call me Bird Shit Preacher Boy. That's who I am.
The Preacher